How to deal with memories?!

I was on the way to that place

I remembered the day when we met after some goddamn months

There we were, two of us, sitting side by side

Silence was the whole loyal companion between us that day

Though we didn't really talk much that day, I felt butterflies on my stomach

Though we didn't come to see each other so often, I felt like we'd known for a long time that I felt we were so connected

That day, I prayed to God once, it was all that I ever wanted: to be secure, to be comfortable around him.

He could make me feel secure and his eyes seriously calmed me down.

I even selfishly asked God if he was the one for me.

Now I am in that place again.

This time, alone.

Without him.

All memories cross my mind.

Once, twice, three times.

This time, I cry and sometimes I thank God, he isn't there beside me to see me miserable like this.

It's even harder to forget someone who seem just perfect, flawless. Like I can give ANYTHING for him. Like I never ever meet somebody like him before.

At times I wish I could find any one negative thing about him, so I could just let it all go.

Sometimes I wonder if I ever got chance just to meet him and spend at least one bloody hour to be with him.

But the other side of me, whispering "Memories are good to remember, but reality is waiting for you... that you must go on, Dev."